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So, what do you do when your little girl walks out of room dressed in purple tights, sandals, a yellow polka dot skirt, and a paint-stained t-shirt that is on backwards?

Do you:

1. Ask her to change?
2. Let it go this time, but lay her clothing out for her yourself from now on?
3. Support her unique fashion sense and ability to dress herself?

Between the ages of 3 and 4, kids begin choosing their own clothes and dressing themselves…and their clothing choices will reflect a style all their own, possibly one that makes you laugh or even frustrates you occasionally.  No matter what, congratulate your child on their ability to dress themselves.  Don’t worry: their sense of style will evolve over time.

In the meantime, try these ideas for encouraging their growing sense of self:

• Look for clothing that your children can put on by themselves. In a previous post, I provided an age-by-age guide for helping your toddler dress themselves with recommendations for clothing that supports your child’s developing motor skills.
• Make sure that clothing is easily accessible to your child, such as in the lowest drawer of a dresser.
• Stock your child’s drawers with clothing that is clean, the correct size, easy for them to put on, and appropriate for the season.
• Involve your child in shopping for their clothing – they are  likely to want to wear things that they picked out themselves.
• If you are concerned about their color coordination, make sure your child’s clothing is in similar or complementary colors so that their outfits are less likely to clash.

Getting dressed by themselves is a big deal for kids, and by being supportive – rather than critical, you are encouraging them to keep trying and to be themselves.

For more information on toddler development milestones, visit:

• The Mayo Clinic’s Child development chart: Preschool milestones
• KidsGrowth Toddler Developmental Milestones: What to Expect….. and when to be concerned!